In just over 10 weeks, Izzy will be here. It’s odd to think about. There’s still so much to do, at home and at work before she gets here. The past 29 weeks have flown by, so I can’t imagine the last few will slow down any, either.
It’s scary, the idea that she will be here, but it’s also a relief. I’ll be able to see her, and hold her, and care for her. It’s hard to just let control go and trust that she and my body know what’s best. I’m sure once she’s here, I’ll have other fears than the ones I have now.
I accomplished the goal of getting rid of a third of everything I own. There’s still so much! We were able to get rid of closer to 2/3 of everything in the garage. That was a pretty big win.
Everyone has been amazing, and supportive and willing to share in our excitement, which has been great. Those that know me, know that I have been waiting so many years to have a baby, and now that it’s this close, I am completely overwhelmed by the love and care from everyone I know.
On a happy note, most of the stupid comments have stopped, that happened about 2 months ago, when I started to show more. I still have a lot of growing to go, but it’s not the norm to hear questions about my size, or how the baby is. I do still hear, “you’re so small”, but it’s more in relation to my overall size, rather than the baby.
I have loved every moment of being pregnant (ok, maybe not the times where I have gone to Ikea hungry and end up miserable with low blood sugar-but I blame that on Ikea, not pregnancy). I have very fortunate to have had minimal side effects, and more energy than most. Every day I am grateful for that too.
Of course, this year and this pregnancy haven’t been without it’s challenges. I still miss my Dad every day, and I still miss Mia’s presence around the house. It’s still heartbreaking to think that Izzy won’t know her Grampa and get to go fishing with him. In a way though, maybe it’s best that she doesn’t know who he was before he died and the sheer amount of pain that he was in physically and mentally. I guess it’s up to me to share who he was, and to teach her all that he taught me.
She’s really been my saving grace this year-I don’t think I could have mustered the strength to get through everything that has happened this year without my tiny beast pushing me. Maybe I could have, who knows, but I am again, so grateful that I have her. She’s not even here, and she pushes me to be better, do more, and to be better.
It’s been great.