What not to do to yourself during early pregnancy…

Step 1 of things not to do in early pregnancy:

Go to Babies R Us.

Whole. Lee. Crap.

If you haven’t ever been there, this is a giant warehouse of baby crap. It is literally floor to ceiling stuff. Its like a hoarder lived in a warehouse and collected so much baby stuff that you need heavy machinery to bring things down.

Step 2 of things not to do in early pregnancy:
Go to Babies R Us, hungry.

I went to the registry desk thinking, sweet….I’ll go in, register and get out.

Oh. No.

They gave me a gun!  Now, before you think-yay!  stuffed animal target practice!!  Pull back a bit. This was a little shopping scanner thing that you walk around with and click on things that you may want.

The gal gave me good advice-“here’s a list, and don’t just get new born items. You’ll have more crap than you’ll need”. Best advice I heard that day.

I roamed around Babies R Hell, scanning myself into a frenzy, seeing how many dance moves and James Bond style scans I could get in. A girls gotta make this fun, right?  And it kept other people away from me, as I am sure they thought that I was nuts. Meh.

I now have close to 100 things on a registry, most of which are functional and most of which were cute. The best part? Some nice guy saw that I was clearly not having fun, and gave his voucher for a $10 gift card. Score. I got to dance, wave my scanner around like James Bond AND I came out ahead. Not a bad way to spent a Saturday.

Speaking of scores…of sorts…My Grandma got me maternity clothes. Please note: My grandma is, well, a Grandma. She knows I love vintage things, and she knows I am not quite sure what I need. She got me some things that aren’t quite my style, but the thought behind it was pretty awesome. She did get me a pant suit made with glitter fabric, that she initially bought for herself.  I’m curious to try this one on, as my Grandma is itty bitty these days.  Here, for your gawking pleasure: the one thing I will be donating (and letting her know that I donated)…While it may look like a skirt/sweater combo with a bacon print, don’t be fooled. The pattern actually looks like microtubules:

So how does this story wrap up? I eventually go home, after stopping at 5 more places, which results in patterns for baby clothes and diaper covers, decaf ginger peach tea, stamps for baby shower and announcements, and a car full of bell and hot pepper plants; a flat of raspberries, a 15 lb box of green beans and a case of strawberries.

Lesson learned?  When you go to Babies R Us, you have to locate more awesome things as fast as possible to get passed the craziness that is that place. Mission accomplished.

Here’s to finding your bit of crazy and a way through it!



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